Friday, August 6, 2010

My Breast

Today's I'm going to talk about breastmeat.

Not just mine, but also chicken's.

I really hate it when fast food counters give me breastmeat/ribcage meat when I already emphasize I want thigh meat/drumstick.

Don't you all hate Fried/Roasted breastmeat? It's so dry and hard and so not nice to eat, I'd rather not eat at all!

That day I bought 2 pieces from Texas Chicken (I think arnold chicken tastes better by the way), and I said I want thigh meat. In the end? I saw the counter staff giving me ribcage meat! I'm not sure if it's called the ribcage, but it's 3/4 breastmeat and 1/4 thigh. The moment I set my eyes on it I know it's not thigh liao.

Sidetrack abit, I think I can open chicken stall liao lor. Without biting, I see the meat I will know is thigh or breast already. SX always think he can bluff me through when he forgets to say "thigh meat" when he buys chicken for me. He always say "IT'S THIGH, YOU SEE", and I'll reply "NO ITS NOT." I think my whole family got this skill. Whenever my mum cook a whole chicken, the thigh parts get grabbed up first ALL THE TIME. Then halfway through when most of the thigh parts get snatched up, we use our chopsticks to poke here poke there see if can find a thigh among all the breast. Lol. And when we confirm there's no more thigh meat, you see no one picking up meat from the plate anymore cos all is breastmeat.

I can also taste overnight chicken from fresh chicken. I think I got this skill because my grandfather used to own a chicken rice stall, my mum used to open another chicken rice stall, and my uncle is currently the boss of his chicken rice stall. And because of this, I eat overnight chicken (cooked with dark sauce and ginger. very nice!) alot as a child.

Okay, back to what I was talking about earlier, when I saw the meat I repeated to the staff "I want thigh meat leh." The staff insisted that it was thigh meat, so I assumed that since she's a staff she should know better than me so brought it back to the office and imagine how irritated I was when I bite into the breastmeat!!!!!

If I was dining in, I would have immediately went to the counter and say "Eh, you SURE this is thigh meat?"

I think fried/roasted breastmeat is unbearable!

I tweeted about this incident and someone replied that eating chicken breastmeat helps in increasing breast tissue.

I KNOW!!! I've noticed this!!

When I was working in a restaurant previously, I realised that those who request breastmeat are all voluptuous!! And all those who request thigh meat have big butts like me -_________-

Although I'm really very flat, but I think that I do not hate myself being like this. Of course I prefer having at least something to grab lah, but even without, I feel perfectly fine. (disclaimer: For Now. if not later next time I complain about being flat you all dig out this post and shoot me. tsk!)

I make flat jokes about myself all the time! I just felt that it's funny, and I really do not mind people saying that I'm flat. I don't think it really matters!! Well, I don't earn a living by flaunting my assets.

One thing I find annoying about being flat is that whenever I wear tube dresses, it tends to drop below my bra and I wont realise it until someone point it out!!! The other time I walked from Orchard mrt to the other end of Wisma with my tube below my bra and I didn't realise. Embarrassing!!!!

Also, loosefront/lowcuts look so horrible on me! I mean, at least other people have at least some meat so it looks fitting. Didn't you realise I wear a tube inside whenever I'm wearing V infront? If only I had some assets to fill it up!!

The ultimate perk of being small-chested?

I'm actually very flabby you know, but people like to describe me as petite or "YOU SO SMALL SIZE WHERE GOT FAT", I have no idea why so I'm blaming it on my lack of assets. It's AN OPTICAL ILLUSION!

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