Friday, March 18, 2011

The Right Mistakes

I'm currently reading this book called 'The Right Mistakes: My Life As A Singapore Gangster", by Foo Yin Tung. He was born in 1988, so quite close to my generation.

I felt that the story was intriguing and you all should go read it too. But I know that the author's reasons for being in a gang doesn't represent all gangsters. At least, I don't think many of them had the conscience he had.

When I was in secondary school, I knew that the most popular guys were probably the 'gangster' type. These guys seemed more 'cool', fierce, and pretty girls were always surrounding them.

However, don't you realise that your liking for these guys grew lesser as time pass by? I guess people become more sensible as they grow up. The normal guys seemed more attractive now and eventually in your mid-twenties, the high-rank corporate guys become the most popular/dream husbands. And these are usually the people you would never had taken a second look in school.

I occasionally used to date these ahbengs because they were my type (-.-) in the past. I had never cared about the gangster affairs of my ex-bfs. I do not know if I was still immature at that time, or because I didn't really care about their wellbeing. Although I'm still dating someone who looks like an ahbeng now, but I know that my preference has changed (anyway when I just got to know him he looked very innocent lol kena bluff). I don't look for that element in a guy anymore, instead, I look for sensiblity and reliablity. One thing about my bf is that he's not really very sensible and usually make wrong choices (arghhhh).

Anyway, I was talking about those young ahbengs. Now moving on to the serious, real gangster with business kind... I've seen wives of old serious gangsters. And I really do not want to be like them. Yea, your husband earns hundreds of thousands every month back home for you to spend, but all these money comes with the risk of you losing your husband to the prison or who-knows-what. Is it really worth it? Can those money cover up for the loss? Can those money cover up for the worrying every single day for the years you are married? Maybe some girls love the thrill or the easy money life but I definitely rather have a normal man to lead a normal life with me. But I think the super high rank ones don't really get caught that easily lah, usually it's the runners who kena caught first. So how likely is the chance that a runner can reach a high rank still intact?

Imagine being locked up for 2 years, 7 years, 15 years just for a fight or a case of drugs handling... that's a damn large part of your life wasted. I hope that anyone who is tempted by the riches of a gangster life knows how much it is not worth it. But oh well, I probably don't really understand what it is like to be in their shoes.

A guy once gave me the impression that he was very proud of his tattoos. He felt that this made him look "stronger" and people would not dare to offend him. I told him, "But they are just scared of you, that's not respect. Respect in the realistic society only goes to those with status and wealth. Not to tattoos and a fierce face."

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