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Thursday, January 9, 2014

Fear Fear Fear

I think I am a super worrier.

I realize that I have been worrying about everything this few days.

Here are some of the things I have been worrying about.

1. Wisdom Tooth Surgery
I went to read wisdom tooth surgery stories online and is now even more afraid after seeing how painful it can be for others. The thought of dealing with the bleeding is enough to make me dread it very much. Sigh. Wisdom tooth why you no grow properly & give me so much pain. Why must people go through unnecessary pain like wisdom tooth? How did people from Tang Dynasty or Qing Dynasty deal with it? Why didn't dramas depict it? I didn't know that stitching is involved till I saw a video on it. I am so afraid! How to brush teeth after?

2. Painkillers
My colleague gave me a painkiller to relieve my piercing pain and at first I thought I finally found a cure and popped one. Then I googled and read the possible side effects. "Increases chances of heart attack/stroke. May cause fatal stomach bleeding and these may happen without warning" WAHLAO so risky one this painkiller. Like this I rather tahan the pain! But I ate one pill already :( Anyway, it didn't work at all.

Then another day, my mum gave me another brand of painkiller. This time, I went to google about it first. Saw a news report about a boy having a violent allergic reaction after taking a small dose of this medicine which caused him to shed 65% of his skin and almost losing his life. Although the doctor said it's a 1 in million rare case, it doesn't mean there is no chance. I read the comments under the article and saw a number of people mentioning that they had allergic reactions to the medicine which caused permanent damage like blinded on one eye, or other serious effects. Nobody knows what allergy one has until it has taken place. This is so dangerous and sudden! One day you are well and just because of a medicine, your whole life changes :(

I'd be extracting my wisdom tooth soon and I'd definitely need painkillers to deal with the pain. I seriously hope that the painkillers prescribed would be effective and safe on me!

3. Fire
I watched "As The Light Goes Out" movie some days back and is very terrified with the explosions and fire, with the building collapsing and all. It reignited my fear for disasters and bad situations as my survivor skills in extreme situations are quite weak I think. I thought of 911 and the tsunami disasters. I guess luck is something very important in life. We need not seek to be at the right place at the right time, as long as we are not at the wrong place at the wrong time. All this thoughts made me feel that people who led a healthy, safe and relatively carefree life till they are old are extremely lucky people. Having a too dramatic life is not good. I really dislike how unpredictable life can be when it comes to bad things! If only bad things only happen to people intentionally seeking for it :(

Suddenly, me losing my memory card feels like a small matter compared to what other people went through. Now, I just hope my wisdom tooth surgery would work out well and I would have a fast and smooth recovery. I won't be doing it any time soon though, as the Lunar New Year, Valentines Day and Nadia's wedding is round the corner. Hopefully the pain on my tooth will wear off soon! Really afraid that it will continue to be painful throughout these few months!


*** I realize that I have blogged about this matter before.
Here: http://www.estherxie.com/2010/05/thanks-for-all-participations-for-first.html
And Here: http://www.estherxie.com/2013/12/utopia.html

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